Beauty for Ashes: Part II

(continued from previous post)

At the time that I began the plasmapheresis treatments, I had been in the hospital for about three and a half months. The treatments were to be performed three times a week, and since it was the first time I was having the treatments done, I was to go through a cycle of 20 treatments.

Following the start of treatment, the doctors became very concerned by my blood work as it showed several serious changes. However, they soon learned that my wonderful body was created by God to return the tests to normal over time: During the three and a half months I had been in the hospital, I had not been able to lift my legs. On Easter morning, I was able to raise my legs for the first time in months! I cannot express adequately to you my feelings of joy to see the difference that the plasmapheresis had made in my life!

Sadly, since plasmapheresis was not performed in Honduras, my daughter Tamara and I had to return to Mississippi to live so that I had access to the treatments. This meant that our family would once again have to be separated, with Tamara and I living in the United States while my husband, Charlie, stayed on the mission field of Honduras. Thankfully, Charlie was able to visit us between short-term missions teams and during the months of October through December when there were no teams. Our family remained separated until the time of Charlie’s death on the mission field in 1986.

With the passing of my husband, I remained in the United States in order to assist with the leadership of BMDMI. I would never again have the honor of serving full time on the mission field of Honduras. I had to surrender my sorrow over the loss of my husband and acceptance of the knowledge that I would not be able to return to the mission field of Honduras. This was a very difficult time in my life.

My ordeal with myasthenia gravis has been a life-long struggle, but it has given many beautiful lessons. It has taught me to lean completely on the Lord, and because of this, I have developed a deep, loving relationship with the Lord. He is my Savior; my best friend who sticks closer than a brother. The disease has also taught me to manage my time, using my time and limited strength wisely. Furthermore, as I stated before, I have learned to focus on the Healer and not on healing.

As Paul suffered during his life, myasthenia gravis has been my thorn in the flesh, but I have learned to see it as my teacher of lessons that have made me more patient and more trusting in the Lord. I have also learned to surrender to God’s plan for my life. Beauty for Ashes. That is myasthenia gravis’ gift to me.